Writing is a very cathartic process for me that too often I don't make time for. The effect is the same whether it's authoring a poem, song, novel or even a simple blog post. I have a theory about writing. Well, really about any form of art. While I know that art is completely subjective and my humble opinion may not matter it is this: that the act of creating art is a way of expressing ones soul to oneself, even if one is not so skilled at it. In my mind then, it is the best, most true form of art which makes no sense at all, except to the artist.
In the moment it's not about what others will enjoy or if anyone else will relate. It's about bringing to life, in words or rhythm or visual interest, those thoughts that rummage around in the corners of your mind, sneaking down hallways then knocking down walls and putting up Christmas lights.
In the pursuit of greener places I am realizing that it's all about perspective. That where you are is not as important as what you choose to think about where you are. That letting go of things you cannot control and holding onto the One who controls all things is where it's truly at. With all that going on in my head I felt the need to write some serious nonsense. So here it is.
The synapses crackled and snapped as they sparked. My hand was on the door so I threw it wide open and shivered as a cool breeze slipped my mind. I turned to silence the phone but those words turned my veins to streams of ice. The cells froze in a frenzy and climbed backwards through my bloodstream, overtaking my heart as it crystalized mid-beat. A name that I recognized but a voice that was distorted by a layer of panic. It took too long. My brain could not connect the blinking marquis dots before the words shot from the receiver and blew my mind. I took a breath and padlocked the door I had opened just moments, or maybe it was a lifetime, ago. Back when I was still free, still an innocent and when a young family's mother was still breathing.
Friday, April 26, 2013
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Healthy 'Living'
This past weekend was so totally not about my health. I went to the doctor with a sick friend, didn't go running, didn't sleep much and nearly offed myself with cleaning supplies. Accidentally of course.
Let's back up. This fab and flattering (uh, sure) story begins with me jonesing for some Martha. Well the sage advice from her magazine at least. Reading Martha Stewart's ' 'Living' makes me feel like I've spent a few minutes with my sweet Gran and I just love her to pieces. We talk about gardening and God and antiques and life and she's my 'go-to' for help with my black thumb. I was thinking of her this weekend which reminded me to get 'Living'.
We found 'Living' at Publix (C'mon Sweetbay, get with the program) but before I could read it we came home to an awful mess thanks to our impatient dog and I had to bleach all our floors. Yuck. Double yuck.
I normally mop with vinegar and water but I felt the level if nastiness required some harder stuff so I thought for a minute about adding bleach.
Ignorant Person PSA: DO NOT MIX VINEGAR AND BLEACH. YOU WILL BE DEAD.
I should have read Martha's April issue first but thankfully Jesus loves me and He allowed me to only use bleach and water, no vinegar. When I finally got to dive into the magazine later I found this:
Thanks to Martha and praise to Jesus for keeping me alive and not letting me mix those things.
In other, more impressive, news we paid off another credit card this week. Woo hoo! Now if I can just learn to clean responsibly we should be on track.
Let's back up. This fab and flattering (uh, sure) story begins with me jonesing for some Martha. Well the sage advice from her magazine at least. Reading Martha Stewart's ' 'Living' makes me feel like I've spent a few minutes with my sweet Gran and I just love her to pieces. We talk about gardening and God and antiques and life and she's my 'go-to' for help with my black thumb. I was thinking of her this weekend which reminded me to get 'Living'.
We found 'Living' at Publix (C'mon Sweetbay, get with the program) but before I could read it we came home to an awful mess thanks to our impatient dog and I had to bleach all our floors. Yuck. Double yuck.
I normally mop with vinegar and water but I felt the level if nastiness required some harder stuff so I thought for a minute about adding bleach.
Ignorant Person PSA: DO NOT MIX VINEGAR AND BLEACH. YOU WILL BE DEAD.
I should have read Martha's April issue first but thankfully Jesus loves me and He allowed me to only use bleach and water, no vinegar. When I finally got to dive into the magazine later I found this:
Thanks to Martha and praise to Jesus for keeping me alive and not letting me mix those things.
In other, more impressive, news we paid off another credit card this week. Woo hoo! Now if I can just learn to clean responsibly we should be on track.
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Oh Glorious Day
Procrastination is one of the things I'm really great at so yes, it's been for-ev-er since I wrote but we're moving past that and onto this story I need to tell you. Listen up because with my blogging track record it may be a few years before you hear from me again.
A few Sundays ago, back in February, a sweet friend who does an awe-inspiring job running the children's ministries at our church asked me if I'd teach with her during the month of March. At our church we teach on rotation, a solid month of Sundays twice a year. My part is not so much 'teaching' anything as it is coordinating the class schedule and keeping things moving along smoothly (we hope). Even though the job is super easy and requires basically zero preparation, I had a jolt of resistance run through me at the thought of spending an entire month in children's church. Mainly due to the very sad but very true fact that I am really selfish. I knew there was no good reason for any answer other than yes but I'm sure she saw the flicker of hesitation in my eyes when I said it. "Uh, sure. I should be able to." I feel like such a terrible person sometimes.
Later that week I was updating my planner during a lunch break (I'm hopelessly devoted to my planner; we spend most days together) and I noticed two things. One, there are five Sundays in March and two, the last two weeks are Palm and Easter Sunday. I could have cried right there; but I didn't because people at work already think I'm odd and I didn't want to add (more) proof. When I saw that little font printed on the last two Sundays I suddenly wanted to cry out because I am so indescribably unworthy. For some crazy, inexplicable reason my God chose to include me, selfish unworthy me, in His plans for teaching the little hearts of Terrace Palms about the greatest day of all time. When all creation on Earth and in the heavenly realms stood in awe at the greatness and majesty of our Lord Jesus Christ; who showed His power by humbling Himself to become like one of us.To resist temptation and become the only perfect sacrifice that could pay the required price for redemption of our souls. He chose to allow me to be a part of the most important story that will ever be taught to these children and I, I cannot believe I hesitated before saying yes.
Sometimes I feel like such a terrible person. Isn't that the whole terrifying, glorious point though?That we are all just a selfish people, sinners, who fall short of the mark in our own individual yet identical ways? Isn't that what makes realizing our unworthiness the most incredible gift? That while we were still sinners, before knowing or even caring about our desperate need for a savior, the Creator of all mankind humbled himself to become like His creation. To be mocked and tortured and unjustly crucified. To prove his unfathomable love for us by being the Savior we so desperately need, the Savior who would be capable of forgetting our selfish acts and would not see us as unworthy when we are paid for by the blood he shed for us.
Over the last few weeks since then, I've been looking forward to each Sunday morning that brings us closer to celebrating such a glorious day. Just yesterday my friend called and told me that last week a young man participated in the class and he would be back for Easter. The boy she mentioned does not know Christ and we get to share His true tale of sacrifice, grace and mercy. I have no feelings of resistance left and I cannot help but feel so blessed. Happy glorious day of all days! When Christ arose and ransomed our souls!
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Autumn's Scent...Like Just Baked Berry Pie
Scientists say that when we first smell a new aroma our minds firmly link that scent with a specific feeling or memory. Then for the rest of our lives we associate that smell with an emotion, especially if the smell and emotion is reinforced over time. With that little tidbit in mind let me tell you (by way of a ridiculously long story) what I have been pondering for the last two weeks. Enjoy!
Have you ever noticed that autumn has a distinct scent? It's crisp and cool when you breathe in, allowing you to smell the aroma of freshly overturned earth mixed in with warm just-out-of-the-oven berry pie and the faint wisp of wood burning in cozy backyard fires. Did you smell it? It's thrilling really; that first hint that says fall is approaching. Without a doubt I know that the scents previously described - when combined with a slight coolness in the air - immediately conjure up 'autumn' in my mind. Then like dominoes falling in rapid succession my thoughts of autumn fall into a swell of emotion which lift my mood to happiness and then to a state of pure delight. This phenomenon occurs regardless of how lofty or vile my mood was prior to the influence of autumn.
During my meteoric rise to happiness a pesky problem usually decides to let itself in the side door. While the revival of my love for all things autumnal is taking place, this uninvited problem rides on the coattails of my emotions and then waits on the sidelines for me to let down my guard. Once my emotions are thoroughly entrenched in the thrill of my favorite season and I am lost in the planning of outdoor gatherings around a bountiful table most certainly decorated with the ideas that I’ve carefully sought over the last year, the problem enters stage-left and I find myself broke. Not broken, just broke. As in, I got so involved and excited that my involved and excited emotions just spent my whole paycheck on things I didn’t know I needed until five minutes ago when I caught the scent of autumn on the breeze. Still with me?
You see the problem is that I start thinking about all the things I want to do, get and accomplish during the few short weeks fall graces us Floridians each year. I start thinking that I want to decorate the house and yard; then I want to invite friends and family to celebrate life with me whilst enjoying my oh-so-lovely decorations I bought courtesy of MasterCard. I want to feel cozy, confident and beautiful therefore I really, really, really want this particular sweaterdress that I cannot afford. I want to capture the feeling of freedom I just had when I breathed in autumn and savor it all year long; but somewhere along the line I became confused and thought I had to choose between my budget and my memory induced feelings.
Ironic how I feel I need to buy something in order to relive a time in my life when money and possessions didn’t matter. A time when, unbeknownst to my nine year old self, my family was desperately struggling to make ends meet. A struggle won by the grace of God. My emotions got muddled in with years of top-notch marketing campaigns and I forgot that my friends and family will celebrate life with me regardless of fancy baubles or strategically placed pumpkins. I had forgotten that He who made the Earth and all that lives and breathes said that I am beautiful, no outrageously expensive sweaterdress required. Furthermore, I had forgotten that He made the season I relish so and that it is He who allows me to relish it for another year.
So now, after much ado about autumn, you ask “What is the moral of this verbose story”? The moral is that the same God who made the seasons, who turns leaves all over the world into a sea of colorful brilliance, who calls us His children and says that we are loved, has called us to be better stewards of what He has so graciously given. The resolution I plan is this – that by the end of this fleeting Florida fall my brain will be prayerfully retrained to link with its creator when I breathe in the scent of autumn.
Have you ever noticed that autumn has a distinct scent? It's crisp and cool when you breathe in, allowing you to smell the aroma of freshly overturned earth mixed in with warm just-out-of-the-oven berry pie and the faint wisp of wood burning in cozy backyard fires. Did you smell it? It's thrilling really; that first hint that says fall is approaching. Without a doubt I know that the scents previously described - when combined with a slight coolness in the air - immediately conjure up 'autumn' in my mind. Then like dominoes falling in rapid succession my thoughts of autumn fall into a swell of emotion which lift my mood to happiness and then to a state of pure delight. This phenomenon occurs regardless of how lofty or vile my mood was prior to the influence of autumn.
During my meteoric rise to happiness a pesky problem usually decides to let itself in the side door. While the revival of my love for all things autumnal is taking place, this uninvited problem rides on the coattails of my emotions and then waits on the sidelines for me to let down my guard. Once my emotions are thoroughly entrenched in the thrill of my favorite season and I am lost in the planning of outdoor gatherings around a bountiful table most certainly decorated with the ideas that I’ve carefully sought over the last year, the problem enters stage-left and I find myself broke. Not broken, just broke. As in, I got so involved and excited that my involved and excited emotions just spent my whole paycheck on things I didn’t know I needed until five minutes ago when I caught the scent of autumn on the breeze. Still with me?
You see the problem is that I start thinking about all the things I want to do, get and accomplish during the few short weeks fall graces us Floridians each year. I start thinking that I want to decorate the house and yard; then I want to invite friends and family to celebrate life with me whilst enjoying my oh-so-lovely decorations I bought courtesy of MasterCard. I want to feel cozy, confident and beautiful therefore I really, really, really want this particular sweaterdress that I cannot afford. I want to capture the feeling of freedom I just had when I breathed in autumn and savor it all year long; but somewhere along the line I became confused and thought I had to choose between my budget and my memory induced feelings.
Ironic how I feel I need to buy something in order to relive a time in my life when money and possessions didn’t matter. A time when, unbeknownst to my nine year old self, my family was desperately struggling to make ends meet. A struggle won by the grace of God. My emotions got muddled in with years of top-notch marketing campaigns and I forgot that my friends and family will celebrate life with me regardless of fancy baubles or strategically placed pumpkins. I had forgotten that He who made the Earth and all that lives and breathes said that I am beautiful, no outrageously expensive sweaterdress required. Furthermore, I had forgotten that He made the season I relish so and that it is He who allows me to relish it for another year.
So now, after much ado about autumn, you ask “What is the moral of this verbose story”? The moral is that the same God who made the seasons, who turns leaves all over the world into a sea of colorful brilliance, who calls us His children and says that we are loved, has called us to be better stewards of what He has so graciously given. The resolution I plan is this – that by the end of this fleeting Florida fall my brain will be prayerfully retrained to link with its creator when I breathe in the scent of autumn.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Going Green-er
Recently, my husband Bill and I [picture a ruggedly handsome free-spirit and a stubborn nerd with a five year plan] decided to make a few drastic changes to our lifestyle. No, we're not running off to join the traveling circus, building an 'Earth Ship' in the desert or moving to Tim-buk-tu (yet) but we are making fundamental changes to how we view and spend money. Some background for you - I'm creating this blog to help me stay on track with our newfound freedom to restrain. Here's the big idea: if I require myself to share our plans and progress with the world (or the two other people reading this blog - Hi Mom, Dad) the follow-thru probability is significantly greater than if I use myself as the acccountibility partner. I know, mind-blowing conclusion right? So now Project: Greener Pastures is no longer just an idea, it is now a glorious reality on the world wide web.
First things first. I figure if we are going to acheive our goals we should start off in the right frame of mind so I have Pastor Billy's sermons from the last few Sundays on constant replay. The sermons remind us of Phillipians 4:8 and to only entertain the thoughts we know to be true. Now, for your reading pleasure I've listed some things I know to be true:
1. Our God is Greater.
2. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.
3. We have debt. A.K.A. we are 'slaves' to the following masters: one decent mortgage company, two fair-weather friends we call 'banks' for vehicle loans, one seriously annoying finance company for a school loan, three practically pure evil credit card companies and three temptress' known as 'store cards')
4. God (who is much greater by the way) is calling us to become free. Debt free, slaves no longer.
You may have noticed the not-so-subtle adjectives used to describe our debtors but just in case....We Don't Like Them! What we really don't like is sending all our hard earned cash to those companies every week. At this point you may be thinking, "Why don't you just work a little extra and pay them off?" Super great idea my friend but Bill and I both get paid 'salary' which carefully translated into the English language means 'work-all-you-want-but-get-paid-the-same-amount'. Now that we've established a fixed income, continue reading to see what we are currently doing to reach "Greener Pastures".
First, we are involved in a Financial Peace University (FPU) class at Cork United Methodist Church in Plant City, FL. FPU was created by Dave Ramsey to teach regular people with everyday income and expenses how to become debt free. We have gained valuable information from this class and I'll be sure to share all the juicy financial details in later posts. Admit it, you're on the edge of your seat right now aren't you? If the excitement is killing you, do not despair. Go straight to www.daveramsey.com/fpu for more info and prepare to be astonished at the simplicity of freedom.
Second, we have side jobs; multiple side jobs. Bill fixes broken things, generally involving power tools and and I clean/organize houses on the weekends. If you are thinking "Cleaning, huh? I could definately see someone else cleaning my house while I spend my time on more valuable tasks like sipping coffee on the porch" it's your lucky day because that's my specialty! Email me at ssorganizing@hotmail.com for more info.
Third, I am a total fan of network marketing business done right and Donald Trump has an incredible new company with top of the line products and affordable vitamins that you can have custom made for your body. Yes I said 'affordable' and 'custom' in the same sentence and it's not make-believe, it IS possible. Technically, you could say I'm business partners with 'The Donald'. If you want more information on living a healthier lifestyle or having a world-class lab custom make vitamins based on only what your body needs check us out at http://www.dsptn.com/ and email me at ssorganizing@hotmail.com. I'd love to talk to you!
Also we're doing some of the 'normal' things people do to save money. I'm exercising my superior skills in frugal-ness and supplementing those skills with coupons for grocery shopping. We have meal plans so food doesn't get wasted and I'm making coffee at home even though 'The Happy Return' has occured at Starbucks shops all around the world. (I miss you Pumpkin Spice Latte. Soon my delicious friend, very soon.) Plus, we're using the Financial Peace University budget and envelope system to 'run like gazelles' away from the hungry cheetah of debt! If you didn't get that just ask me. I'll tell you more about these 'normal' things later.
Lastly, this Saturday, September 25th we're having a HUGE yard sale!! To help us stop clinging needlessly to our 'stuff' we're selling a ton of things we like but just don't NEED. Ladies, I know it's a drive to Zephyrhills but I'll be selling tons of treasures in great condition and for ridiculously fair prices. Items like furniture, clothing, dishes, electronics, books, wall art (Donna if you're reading this the candle holder you liked is yours if you still want it!) Southern Living at Home and Party Lite decor, never-used-before Pampered Chef items and yes, possibly even my beloved Princess House dishes! If that doesn't show you how committed I am to this I don't know how else to prove it! If you have any questions on the yard sale email, text, or call me!
If you just took the time to read my novel (sorry, I'm the stubborn nerd with the five year plan) then you may be thinking "Why? Why do all this work to strive and deprive yourself of simple pleasures?" Maybe you're thinking "You only live once" or "Why save, you can't take it with you" or even "You'll always have some debt, it's just a fact of life". Then maybe you'll even enter a well meaning comment to that effect. To those thoughts and well meaning comments I have only one reply; I do not know any of those things to be true.
Thanks for following us on the trek to Greener Pastures!
First things first. I figure if we are going to acheive our goals we should start off in the right frame of mind so I have Pastor Billy's sermons from the last few Sundays on constant replay. The sermons remind us of Phillipians 4:8 and to only entertain the thoughts we know to be true. Now, for your reading pleasure I've listed some things I know to be true:
1. Our God is Greater.
2. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.
3. We have debt. A.K.A. we are 'slaves' to the following masters: one decent mortgage company, two fair-weather friends we call 'banks' for vehicle loans, one seriously annoying finance company for a school loan, three practically pure evil credit card companies and three temptress' known as 'store cards')
4. God (who is much greater by the way) is calling us to become free. Debt free, slaves no longer.
You may have noticed the not-so-subtle adjectives used to describe our debtors but just in case....We Don't Like Them! What we really don't like is sending all our hard earned cash to those companies every week. At this point you may be thinking, "Why don't you just work a little extra and pay them off?" Super great idea my friend but Bill and I both get paid 'salary' which carefully translated into the English language means 'work-all-you-want-but-get-paid-the-same-amount'. Now that we've established a fixed income, continue reading to see what we are currently doing to reach "Greener Pastures".
First, we are involved in a Financial Peace University (FPU) class at Cork United Methodist Church in Plant City, FL. FPU was created by Dave Ramsey to teach regular people with everyday income and expenses how to become debt free. We have gained valuable information from this class and I'll be sure to share all the juicy financial details in later posts. Admit it, you're on the edge of your seat right now aren't you? If the excitement is killing you, do not despair. Go straight to www.daveramsey.com/fpu for more info and prepare to be astonished at the simplicity of freedom.
Second, we have side jobs; multiple side jobs. Bill fixes broken things, generally involving power tools and and I clean/organize houses on the weekends. If you are thinking "Cleaning, huh? I could definately see someone else cleaning my house while I spend my time on more valuable tasks like sipping coffee on the porch" it's your lucky day because that's my specialty! Email me at ssorganizing@hotmail.com for more info.
Third, I am a total fan of network marketing business done right and Donald Trump has an incredible new company with top of the line products and affordable vitamins that you can have custom made for your body. Yes I said 'affordable' and 'custom' in the same sentence and it's not make-believe, it IS possible. Technically, you could say I'm business partners with 'The Donald'. If you want more information on living a healthier lifestyle or having a world-class lab custom make vitamins based on only what your body needs check us out at http://www.dsptn.com/ and email me at ssorganizing@hotmail.com. I'd love to talk to you!
Also we're doing some of the 'normal' things people do to save money. I'm exercising my superior skills in frugal-ness and supplementing those skills with coupons for grocery shopping. We have meal plans so food doesn't get wasted and I'm making coffee at home even though 'The Happy Return' has occured at Starbucks shops all around the world. (I miss you Pumpkin Spice Latte. Soon my delicious friend, very soon.) Plus, we're using the Financial Peace University budget and envelope system to 'run like gazelles' away from the hungry cheetah of debt! If you didn't get that just ask me. I'll tell you more about these 'normal' things later.
Lastly, this Saturday, September 25th we're having a HUGE yard sale!! To help us stop clinging needlessly to our 'stuff' we're selling a ton of things we like but just don't NEED. Ladies, I know it's a drive to Zephyrhills but I'll be selling tons of treasures in great condition and for ridiculously fair prices. Items like furniture, clothing, dishes, electronics, books, wall art (Donna if you're reading this the candle holder you liked is yours if you still want it!) Southern Living at Home and Party Lite decor, never-used-before Pampered Chef items and yes, possibly even my beloved Princess House dishes! If that doesn't show you how committed I am to this I don't know how else to prove it! If you have any questions on the yard sale email, text, or call me!
If you just took the time to read my novel (sorry, I'm the stubborn nerd with the five year plan) then you may be thinking "Why? Why do all this work to strive and deprive yourself of simple pleasures?" Maybe you're thinking "You only live once" or "Why save, you can't take it with you" or even "You'll always have some debt, it's just a fact of life". Then maybe you'll even enter a well meaning comment to that effect. To those thoughts and well meaning comments I have only one reply; I do not know any of those things to be true.
Thanks for following us on the trek to Greener Pastures!
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